This week’s question was asked by Hugh Gadick of Den Haag, Netherlands:

Write a 50 word personals ad for each member of the Haus of Honies to appear in your local newspaper.

Nick:

Desperately seeking Susan. And by Susan, I mean David Beckham. But if he’s unavailable, I might consider sleeping with one of you bitches. If you’re lucky! That’s right I said it. I want body hair, facial hair and a well-trimmed beard or stubble. Looking for a spit for this little piggy.

Benutty:

Horny troll bottom looking for dom black top for corporate understall action. You come in. Find the stall next to the giggling mess. Tap your leather boot. I’ll put down my iPhone, stop blogging and will return your favors.

Jay:

Looking for a whistle. You see, I’m a whistleblower. Nothing gets me hotter than blowing on my union whistle and using a bullhorn. I’d love to grab you by the bull’s horns and take you for a ride. Pig bottoms only, please. You see, I miss my boyfriend.

Alfie:

SWM seeks SWMtF for transexual naked yoga encounter. Cannot host. Creepy roommate is always trying to get in on the action. Must be discreet. Did I mention I have a girlfriend who is also up for the challenge?

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Stay tuned for the other responses this week.

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