Posts tagged new years 2010

Benutty v. Gary Jr.

In order to prove what a goddamn mess he is, your Honor, I’d like to call the defendant, Gary Jr., to the stand.

Rests,

Benutty

Our New Years Resolutions

We Resolve

Last night I hosted my annual New Years party – with all the most important huhhnies in attendance. Obviously, it was good times. We had a Resolution Wall where everyone anonymously posted their 2010 resolutions, and although most of them aren’t really goals for the year most of them are hateful enough to share. I’ll attempt to point out the ones other D@2 contributors posted and I won’t correct anyone’s poor, poor spelling mistakes.

More sequens 2010!

I licked all the champs bottles! :)

Floss More

see Adam Lambert in concert!

Gain 20 lbs.

empty the DVR (benutty)

perfect my monster claw (benutty)

Apply to Grad School

Orgasims every time NO HANDS!

Half a bottle of liquor a day by 2011!!

steal 3rin’s dress for myself (benutty)

stop drinking 2 bottles of Blueberry vodka a DAY! (benutty)

Kill All Trolls (nick)

Ride A Century [stick figure drawing of man on bike]

July 07: “I want to train for AIDS LifeCycle in 2010.” – Nick (benutty)

Graduate

when I get my next colonoscopy i hope the dr. doesn’t say “my, gary jr., you’ve gotten looser since last week.” (benutty)

Benutty is a dumb troll… (nick)

Yoga!

dance in the dark (benutty)

see str8(acting) (benutty)

win Catan every time I play (gary jr.) won’t happen Gary Jr. (some dumb bitch)

don’t invite pigs to my parties (benutty) or panties (some dumb cow)

Try to lose some troll weight & get electrolysis (gary jr.)

Get a monkey & a robot dog (jay)

Decorate my house

see Rihanna in concert (benutty)

Live to see 2:01 am!

So it looks like I wrote most of the hateful ones (and most of the other ones, too). The important thing to remember is that none of these resolutions are manageable by any of the nasty farm animals that posted them (except for maybe the “gain 20 lbs” one, Nick will complete that by Monday) and no one is going to live to see 2:01 am!

Oops!,

Benutty