–Britney Spears: Hold It Against Me–

I’d like to start by saying there is nothing special about this song.  Secondly I would like to remind people of another song that came out in 2009… it was Madonna’s Celebration which was completely panned by all for being too basic with a dated club sound.  Now fast forward to 2011 and Britney has released a song that is in my opinion also too basic with a dated club sound.  Apparently Madonna is still ahead of music trends… who knew?   I would also like to point out how this songs pattern is much like Rihanna’s Only Girl (In The World).  Listen to the two and tell me there isn’t a similarity.

In the end this song is lacking greatly in epic-ness! Comparing this song to the likes of Oops… I Did It Again, Gimme More, and Womanizer (other lead singles) this one just has no unique qualities to it.  I’ve listened to it 5 times now, and I am already bored.

HATE IT!

–Avril Lavigne: What The Hell–

Over the years I have grown to like Avril Lavigne’s music, but don’t get me wrong I still hate Sk8r Boi… possibly one of the worst songs ever made.  But with songs like Don’t Tell Me, Keep Holding On and I’m With You (one of my personal favorite songs ever) she has certainly grown.  This does not mean that I am not always worried about something new… her recent song for the Alice in Wonderland movie sucked, but this new song I actually like a lot.  It is ridiculously poppy and upbeat, and hello it’s message is about saying fuck it lets just have fun.

Although this song is not original in any way (much like Britney’s new song) it is actually fun to listen to which can’t be said for Britney’s new tune.  This song will inspire me at work tomorrow to say… fuck it lets have fun instead! I’m sure my boss will appreciate it. 

LOVE IT!

What do you all think of these new songs?  Agree with me? Disagree with me?

Cuddles with my boo and baked chocolate brownies
Men with cute accents and things that are cuties
Double cheeseburgers with fried onion strings
These are a few of my favorite things

When the troll bites, when the cow sings
When I’m feeling sad,
I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don’t feel so bad.

Beware… This video contains 3 Drag Queens, Booze and Bad Lip Syncing!  (oh and near nudity!)

Scissor Sisters – Night Work

The Scissor Sisters have a whole lot of sass, and this album is full of it.   This is yet another great album by them…  Listening to this album is reminds me of those old Duran Duran videos from the 80′s….  I’m not sure how to explain that… you just have to know.   This album was produced by Stuart Price (who also produced Madonna’s Confessions on a Dancefloor)… he has been quite the busy bee this year producing all sorts of amazing albums!   If you like dancing music that is inspired by the 70′s and 80′s then pick this bitch up!

Stand out tracks:

Night Work, Fire With Fire, Any Which Way, Harder You Get, Invisible Light

Kylie Minogue – Aphrodite

Well you should know first that like Madonna… Kylie can do no wrong.  Aphrodite is a fantastic album, also produced by Stuart Price, that goes back to pure basic pop music.   This is what she does best, and if you like upbeat feel good music and you aren’t listening to Kylie then you are missing out big time.  This album reminds me of my trip to Europe back in 2002 when I first bought Kylie’s Light Years.   I remember being on a train from Milan to Barcelona listening to that album non-stop and just being so happy and excited… how could a vacation not be good when listening to Kylie.  Seriously you need to buy this shit… actually you need to buy Kylie’s last 5 albums.  They are all excellent.  This bitch better tour here again or else!

Stand out tracks:

All The Lovers, Get Outta My Way, Closer, Everything Is Beautiful, Aphrodite, Better Than Today

Miley Cyrus – Can’t Be Tamed

Yea I know… What the fuck is Nick mentioning this annoying bitch for?? right?   Well I kept hearing how her new album was pretty gay and dancey, so I checked out some tracks and it pains me to say that I actually enjoy some of her songs.  I know… get the cross out and hang me on it… (just make sure Madonna is singing in front of it… what!).   Anyways I don’t think I am going to become some big Miley fan, but I’ll give the little bitch credit for making some catchy songs… plus who doesn’t like a slut!

Stand out tracks:

Liberty Walk, Two More Lonely People, Permanent December

Kids of 88 – Just A Little Bit

Make The Girl Dance – Kill It

Livvi Franc – Automatik

Q: Answer the following taboo questions:

RELIGION, PHILOSOPHY AND POLITICS:

01) Do you believe in God?
–Although I enjoy fairy tales, I do not believe they actually exist.

02) What religion, if any, do you most identify yourself with?
–I don’t identify with any religion.  Organized religion is wrong.

03) Do you feel that your religious beliefs have a place in the legislative process?
–I don’t think anyone’s religious beliefs should have a place in politics.

04) How do you feel about gun control in America?
–I am against guns. We should repeal the 2nd amendment.

05) Are the homosexuals going to ruin the institution of marriage in America?
–Heterosexuals have already done that.

SEX, DRUGS, AND ROCK N ROLL:

01) If you had to have sex with a celebrity that went against your sexual preference for the good of the world, who would you choose?
–Madonna (duh)

02) If you had to have sex with someone you know that went against your sexual preference for the good of the world, who would you choose?
–Irene haha

03) What dead person would you most like to have had sex with before they departed this mortal coil?
–Um… JFK Jr.

04) Have you ever had a threesome or been involved in an orgy with more than three people?
–Of course… many times.

05) Excluding multiple partner sex, have you ever had sex with more than one person in a 24 hour period?
–Sure have.

06) What about a 12 hour period you dirty whore?
–No… I am not a dirty whore thank you very much!

07) Do you LIKE pornography you pervert?
–Probably not as much as everyone else, but I do enjoy it.   The problem here is finding something with men I find attractive.

08) Have you ever talked on the phone during sex?
–I think I did once a long time ago.

09) If so, how long was the phone conversation as opposed to the actual sex?
–It was a short conversation.

10) Have you ever been tied up and used like the dirty slut you are?
–Do I look like Gary Jr?  Nope.. I don’t like that kind of stuff.

11) What is the strangest place you have ever had sex?
–Next to a dumpster in an alley, or in a restaurant bathroom.

12) What is your opinion on anal sex?
–It takes a lot of work.  Preparing, executing, cleaning… It’s not always worth the time.

13) Okay be honest – do you REALLY like performing oral sex or is it just a necessary evil you have to commit to in order to please your partner and wait for your turn?
–I like doing it.  Doesn’t bother me I guess. (Jay… don’t get ideas)

14) Did you fall in love with the first person other than yourself who gave you an orgasm?
–No… the first person to give me an orgasm was lame, and uneventful.

15) Lastly, to give our readers something to savor, have you ever tasted your own jizz?
–Of course I have.  There is no way any guy has never done this… curiosity is a bitch!
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Stay tuned for the other responses this week.

Submit your own Question of the Week.

#10

#10: Madonna – Celebration (Benny Benassi Remix Edit)

Obviously I could not leave Madonna off this list.  The original version of this song was pretty shitty, but thankfully this remix came out.  It’s no wonder she used this for her video.

#9

#9: Lily Allen – The Fear

It’s too bad she is a coke whore, and decided to stop making music.  Her last album “Its Not Me, It’s You” is pretty good.

#8

#8: Cobra Starship – Good Girl Gone Bad (Feat. Leighton Meester)

I typically don’t like stupid straight boy music, but this is surprisingly good.  It helps that Blair from Gossip Girl is featured on it… love that bitch.

#7

#7: Dragonette – We Rule The World

Love love love this song.  If there had been more time in 2009 I am sure this would have ended up a lot higher on my list.

#6

#6: Lady Gaga – Alejandro

First of all… Alejandro is my favorite name of all time.  So cute.  Secondly this song kick ass. Ale ale jandro ale ale jandro.

#5

#5: Lady Gaga – Dance In The Dark

This song probably wouldn’t have made it on my list if I had not seen her live.  She opened the show with this and it was amazing.  Every time I listen to this I think of that. So good.

#4

#4: Blake Lewis – Heartbreak On Vinyl

If you have not heard his new album then you should.  It’s way better than his first album or anything he did on American Idol.  Dance. Fun. Yes.

#3

#3: Lady Gaga – Monster

My new favorite song from Lady Gaga. That boy is a monster… mo mo mo monster!

#2

#2: Adam Lambert – Music Again

This is the type of song I knew he would have on his album, and it’s my favorite.  This whole album is amazing actually.  Even my mom loves it.   Lots of his songs were in my top 20, but didn’t make it to the top 10 (For Your Entertainment, If I Had You, Sleepwalker, Fever and Broken Open)

#1

#1: Lady Gaga – Bad Romance

Duh!  Obviously this was going to be number 1.  The song = amazing! The video = fucking amazing! The performances = totally fucking amazing hunnneees yes!   If you don’t like this song you are a damn mess and you die tonight at 2am.