Next stop… Whores!
Posts tagged Job
So What! Who Cares?!?
Feb 23rd
A few weeks ago I applied for a job and played phone tag with the recruiter. She left me a message saying that they would like to interview me and she confirmed a date. So I called her back and got her voicemail. This was the voice message I left for her:
“Hi. This is Gary Jr. returning your phone call regarding the available position. I am absolutely available to meet with you on Wednesday at 10:30 in the morning. I’m excited to meet you and further discuss my qualifications. If you have any questions or issues, feel free to call me back. Otherwise, I will see you on Wednesday. Thanks, Gary.”
That’s right. I finished my voice message to a recruiter with a complimentary close! Best wishes! Yours truly! Kind regards! Sincerely, the guy you aren’t going to hire.
Needless to say, I didn’t get the job. So what! Who cares?!?
Not-So-Deep Thoughts
Feb 6th
“If you ever feel like quitting your job, I think you should just do it. It’s not like you need the money anyway. Oh wait… Maybe you do. Sorry Gary Jr.”
Dear Career,
Jan 20th
Hey. What’s up? I’m not sure if you know who I am, but we had a few classes together back in high school. I thought you were pretty cute then and when I came across your page on Facebook today I figured I’d send you a quick hello.
Secretly after the first time I saw you I got it in my head that one day I’d be your husband. I tried hard to become what I had imagined you’d want in a man — went to a good college, got a job with a large company — all in the hopes that one day we’d run into each other on the street, fall in love, and, making like lesbians, wed within the week.
Sadly I haven’t seen you in San Francisco though. I looked around your page a little, but couldn’t tell from the Info section where exactly you’re at nowadays, or if you’re involved with anyone, or what your net-worth is. To tell you the truth your page is kinda skim of details. But I’d love to get to know you better so give me a call or something, would ya?
To be honest, the guy I’m dating now is kind of a loser and I’d love to ditch him for you. His name is Job and he sucks. He wakes me up too early and stays too late, he brings over annoying friends and has idiots for parents. I swear being with him makes me wish I had just sucked up my nerves and approached you back in high school. Perhaps I’d be happier than I am now.
Anyway, hope you’re doing well. Let me know if you’re interested.
Pics to trade,
Benutty