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Posts tagged Jiz
Oh I’ll Mark My Spot Alright
Mar 13th
Thanks to 3rin I now have a new 3rd Obsession (1st Obsession is the Telephone video and 2nd Obsession is still Jiz). Three cheers for viral marketing campaigns.
And how much more sexy is Mehcad Brooks/Eggs knowing his stance on marriage??!!
These Are a Few of My Favorite Things
Mar 10th
I really fucking love a lot of things in the world, but two things I really really really freaking effing fucking love are 1) taking private investigator photos of strangers on my eyePhone, and 2) men’s crotches.
And on top of that, I jiz over a hottie that sits with his legs wide apart. Oooooooaaaahooohhh hunnnnns. Like these fine ass cookies:
I know, I know. I’m not a pro P.I. yet coz those pic-a-licks are hella mami blurry but the point is that all three of those guys are hot because they’re spreading their legs. Mmmmm. It’s like a cave you just wanna crawl into and hibernate in for the summer.
Month in Media: February
Feb 28th
Let’s take a look at the things in entertainment that the D@2 bloggers loved most in the month of February!
Benutty
YouTube Clip – Jiz: The Abortion Episode by Sienna d’Enima
I’m sorry. The Jiz episodes are like The Amazing Race at the Emmys — they will always be my favorite clips so long as a new one has come out! This one in particular is fucking brillballs2012. The queen that makes these is meticulous about timing and creating dialogue that fits with the characters’ movements. Lovesmucho.
D@2 Post – The Truth about Gary Jr and Alfie…
Alfie doesn’t post often, but this shit killed me. He’s a quick study, having already learned how to be funnier than Nick. Work it, mamiauntieKe$hahoney.
TV Show – Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains
You know I love this shit, mami. On their 20th season and it’s still thought-provoking, fresh, and charitable. The only thing that could make it better is me being cast on a season with Ozzy Lusth. Or him marrying me, thank you.
Music – Rude Boy by Rihanna
This bitch can do no wrong in my book. I even liked her when she got beat up. Even Glambert called this song/video fresh. Her new album is highly underrated, and this song is proof of it!
SNL Skit – New Car Horns featuring Jenny Slate
Hiiii-lo! Jenny Slate will be the new star of SNL once Wiig leaves, suriously. And this clip came just in time to make the February media list — airing Feb. 27th when Jennifer Lopez hosted. This fucking bitch Tina Tina kills me! If you never saw her original skit New Doorbells then you must watch that also. So good. Beep. Honk honk. Whhhhhhhat?
Gary Jr.
YouTube Clip – To the Mothership Sucka by K80Blog
I have always been in love with K80Blog. I think she is brilliant and I love her bestie, KateReadsBooks. Anyhoosiers, they are creative and keep me coming back for more. I wasn’t sure if I should use their interview series but I decided instead on this one. Mostly because I love her lips when she’s talking alien, I love the alien voice, I love the inane discussion about toast and I love the fact that she saved her pup from alien destruction. Awww. Thank you K80Blog. That will be negative $5. Fuck you Charles. I’m a lady! I believe the children are our future.
D@2 Post – The World’s First DeadRuntz Comic
This post killed me! Even though Nick posted it. It was clearly a collaboration between all the hunnies and therefore it was awesome! Honorable Mentions go to a dirty tranny, a hilarious comic from a viewer and a YouTube clip from a troll.
TV Show – Lost
I’m sorry but I need to mention Lost. I need some answers. And I love all the weird stuff that’s happen. Is Jacob bad? Eeee. I don’t know! Is it good versus evil? And I’m so excited. Honorable Mention goes to RuPaul’s Drag Race.
Music – Kids by MGMT
Ever since 3rin mentioned them during our Grammy’s posts, I’ve been listening to them. I’m loving them. Although, I think this video is kinda creepy, I also kinda LOVE it. What the hell is wrong with me? Don’t answer that, you dirty whores.
Olympians I’d Like to Sleep with – Shaun White and/or/threesomes with Evan Lysacek
I could care less about which country wins skeleton or curling. I only watch this shit to fantasy about all the hot bodies. I don’t care if Shaun White is a ginger or not. I’d do him. I love that hair and strong chin. Evan Lysacek….baby, Ima do you and do you hard. Nuf said. Hey Evan, wanna hear a joke. I just put a roofie in your drink. Haha. Funny. But not kidding.
Nick
D@2 Post – So What! Who Cares?!?
This is probably one of my favorite posts of all time. This stupid bitch kills me… seriously someone needs to follow Gary Jr. around and film his life. Poor Misha.
Music – Rocket by Goldfrapp
After her departure from dance/electronica for her last album, bitch brings back the dance with this one. I love the 80’s flare it has, seriously one of the best songs in a long time.
TV Show – RuPaul’s Drag Race
Um how could you not like a show featuring drag queens battling it out to be the next drag superstar. Off it. Plus to make things sweeter, they give these messes alcohol which ramps up the drama. Gay man’s dream.
Sports – The Winter Olympics
I have been obsessed with the Winter Olympics this month!!! It’s so nice to see different types of sports on TV at prime time. Basketball, Football, and Baseball just get so fucking boring to watch all the time. Highlights for me were Snowboard Cross, Ski Cross, Ice Dancing, Luge, Speed Skating, and Figure Skating. It’s sad to write this though because today was the last day of the Olympics… I’m watching the closing ceremonies as I write this, but I guess I’ll have to start looking forward to the 2012 Summer Olympics in London.
iPhone App – Lose It!
Hello… Everybody knows how I am trying to lose weight thru calorie counting n shit, and this is the best app to get for that. It’s so easy to keep tracked of everything, and it even sends you reminders to enter in your meals. You can also add friends, and lose weight together. Sadly none of my friends wanted to join with me.
Month in Media: January
Jan 31st
Let’s take a look at the things in entertainment that the D@2 bloggers loved most in the month of January!
Benutty
Music Video – “On to the Next One” by Jay-Z with Swizz Beatz
This shit is soooo effing tight. I sweat for the girls drop-dancing and the druggie in the hoodie. Mami wants.
YouTube Clip – Jiz and the Mammograms
“This is the motherfucking dress I’m going to get motherfucking gangbanged in tonight.” On daily repeat. Don’t think I won’t make a ringtone of it.
Sports – Arizona vs. Green Bay
I literally like seriously almost wet myself over the missed field goal at the end and the completely random turnover to finish the game in overtime. I was banking on an AZ win for a pool I was in so I was really excited — too bad those queens went and ruined it the following week. Oh well. Go Colts!
TV Show – The Jersey Shore
I mean, seriously? This show killed me every feeeeeucking week. Snooki was goddamn hilarious. Who ever knew there were so many fantastic words for DBs? Grenade. Grenade Launcher. Hippo. Creature.
Album – Stronger with Each Tear by Mary J. Blige
I really played this album out this month. It’s very typ of MJB lately — and, let’s face it, the self-empowerment-I-can-do-anything-because-I-overcame-so-much-adversity thing is getting old — but you can’t deny that the bitch has an amazing voice. And her songs are so sweet most of the time! Aww.
D@2 Post – Dead at 2am: Part 2
This killed me. It made me want to die at 2 again! “Champaaaaaaaagne.” D@2 Blogger? ME! Feeeeeucking Safeway aisle 8 spill janitor.
Gary Jr.
Music Video – “Fixin’ to Thrill” by Dragonette
God, I do love my Dragonette. When I spotted this music video which I had never seen before, poop may have come out. …………………..Of my mouth.
Movie – A Single Man
Isherwood is a weirdo but I loved this movie. Colin Firth can be my silver daddy any day.
YouTube Clip – Cadbury Eyebrows
First, I love chocolate. Second, I love this song. Third, I love overly mobile eyebrows.
TV Show – Modern Family
This show is soo awesome. I am Cameron. That’s all I have to say. Go watch the episode called The Incident. Shelley Long plays the crazy mom. It’s so awesome. It’s worth it.
Sports – Nadal/Murray match at the Australian Open
Okay. If I’m going to post a sports highlight, it will likely only be tennis or figure skating. Anyway, Nadal is hot and the Australian Open is kick ass. The build up for this showdown was awesome. Too bad Hottie Nadal bowed out. Puss. Yeah! Not so gay now, am I sluts! L’Angie that post was for you.
D@2 Post – Nick’s Answer to a Question of the Week
Anytime you can get Nick to write an awesome post about you kicking him in his balls, you know that’s a media highlight.
Nick
Current TV: American Idol
Every January I go into American Idol mode. Sadly it is one of my favorite TV shows. I’m not so sure about Ellen yet, so we’ll see how she does during Hollywood week.
Classic TV: Roseanne
You really can’t go wrong with white trash. No matter how many times I see these episodes they are always funny.
Music: Ke$ha
This bitch is off it. Listen to this album will make you want to dance on stripper poles for money. Loves it.
TV Network: The Food Network
Hello!… Chopped, The Worst Cooks in Amercia and the ever enjoyable Unwrapped. It’s like seriously the best network ever.
Favorite YouTube Channel, and Video: Peach Diaries
Seriously.. Peach Diaries is the best channel ever! Princess Peach has never been more entertaining.
D@2 Post: Benutty v. Gary Jr.
This truly is the essence of who we are. It doesn’t get any better than this.