Posts tagged Evan Lysacek

Month in Media: February

Let’s take a look at the things in entertainment that the D@2 bloggers loved most in the month of February!

Benutty

YouTube Clip – Jiz: The Abortion Episode by Sienna d’Enima
I’m sorry. The Jiz episodes are like The Amazing Race at the Emmys — they will always be my favorite clips so long as a new one has come out! This one in particular is fucking brillballs2012. The queen that makes these is meticulous about timing and creating dialogue that fits with the characters’ movements. Lovesmucho.

D@2 Post – The Truth about Gary Jr and Alfie…
Alfie doesn’t post often, but this shit killed me. He’s a quick study, having already learned how to be funnier than Nick. Work it, mamiauntieKe$hahoney.

TV Show – Survivor: Heroes vs. Villains
You know I love this shit, mami. On their 20th season and it’s still thought-provoking, fresh, and charitable. The only thing that could make it better is me being cast on a season with Ozzy Lusth. Or him marrying me, thank you.

Music – Rude Boy by Rihanna
This bitch can do no wrong in my book. I even liked her when she got beat up. Even Glambert called this song/video fresh. Her new album is highly underrated, and this song is proof of it!

SNL Skit – New Car Horns featuring Jenny Slate
Hiiii-lo! Jenny Slate will be the new star of SNL once Wiig leaves, suriously. And this clip came just in time to make the February media list — airing Feb. 27th when Jennifer Lopez hosted. This fucking bitch Tina Tina kills me! If you never saw her original skit New Doorbells then you must watch that also. So good. Beep. Honk honk. Whhhhhhhat?

Gary Jr.

YouTube Clip – To the Mothership Sucka by K80Blog
I have always been in love with K80Blog. I think she is brilliant and I love her bestie, KateReadsBooks. Anyhoosiers, they are creative and keep me coming back for more. I wasn’t sure if I should use their interview series but I decided instead on this one. Mostly because I love her lips when she’s talking alien, I love the alien voice, I love the inane discussion about toast and I love the fact that she saved her pup from alien destruction. Awww. Thank you K80Blog. That will be negative $5. Fuck you Charles. I’m a lady! I believe the children are our future.

D@2 Post – The World’s First DeadRuntz Comic
This post killed me! Even though Nick posted it. It was clearly a collaboration between all the hunnies and therefore it was awesome! Honorable Mentions go to a dirty tranny, a hilarious comic from a viewer and a YouTube clip from a troll.

TV Show – Lost
I’m sorry but I need to mention Lost. I need some answers. And I love all the weird stuff that’s happen. Is Jacob bad? Eeee. I don’t know! Is it good versus evil? And I’m so excited. Honorable Mention goes to RuPaul’s Drag Race.

Music – Kids by MGMT
Ever since 3rin mentioned them during our Grammy’s posts, I’ve been listening to them. I’m loving them. Although, I think this video is kinda creepy, I also kinda LOVE it. What the hell is wrong with me? Don’t answer that, you dirty whores.

Olympians I’d Like to Sleep with – Shaun White and/or/threesomes with Evan Lysacek
I could care less about which country wins skeleton or curling. I only watch this shit to fantasy about all the hot bodies. I don’t care if Shaun White is a ginger or not. I’d do him. I love that hair and strong chin. Evan Lysacek….baby, Ima do you and do you hard. Nuf said. Hey Evan, wanna hear a joke. I just put a roofie in your drink. Haha. Funny. But not kidding.

Nick

D@2 Post – So What! Who Cares?!?
This is probably one of my favorite posts of all time.  This stupid bitch kills me… seriously someone needs to follow Gary Jr. around and film his life.   Poor Misha.

Music – Rocket by Goldfrapp
After her departure from dance/electronica for her last album, bitch brings back the dance with this one.  I love the 80′s flare it has, seriously one of the best songs in a long time.

TV Show – RuPaul’s Drag Race
Um how could you not like a show featuring drag queens battling it out to be the next drag superstar.  Off it.  Plus to make things sweeter, they give these messes alcohol which ramps up the drama.  Gay man’s dream.

Sports – The Winter Olympics
I have been obsessed with the Winter Olympics this month!!!  It’s so nice to see different types of sports on TV at prime time. Basketball, Football, and Baseball just get so fucking boring to watch all the time.   Highlights for me were Snowboard Cross, Ski Cross, Ice Dancing, Luge, Speed Skating, and Figure Skating.  It’s sad to write this though because today was the last day of the Olympics… I’m watching the closing ceremonies as I write this, but I guess I’ll have to start looking forward to the 2012 Summer Olympics in London.

iPhone App – Lose It!
Hello… Everybody knows how I am trying to lose weight thru calorie counting n shit, and this is the best app to get for that.  It’s so easy to keep tracked of everything, and it even sends you reminders to enter in your meals.  You can also add friends, and lose weight together. Sadly none of my friends wanted to join with me.

Nick’s Greatest Moments: The Bitch Slapping Incident

My friend Vanessa and I were really good friends, and we did everything together. If you invited me somewhere you knew Vanessa would be in tow, and vice versa. She was my first official fag-hag (Alfie is my current one if you were wondering… that’s right, I said it). I remember one night it was raining, and we had made plans to go to Anna and Jeremy’s house. They had been a couple for 2 or 3 years at the time, and they were both very attractive. Seriously… I would have done Jeremy without a second thought (sorry Anna). Vanessa asked me not to drink to much that night, so that I could drive home since the weather was shitty. She was always worried about that kind of shit, and hello… I am like the best driver ever.

I ended up drinking a little more than I probably should have that night… well not a little, more like I drank a whole lot. As it got later Vanessa finally realized that I was still drinking, and that I was totally wasted. The next thing I know she slaps me across the face!

  • Vanessa: You fucker!
  • Nick: What the fuck is that for bitch?
  • Vanessa: You are supposed to drive tonight
  • Nick: I can still drive
  • Vanessa: No you CAN’T!

And she slapped me again.

  • Nick: Stop fucking hitting me you fucking cunt. I’ll sober up and we can go.
  • Vanessa: You’re such a fucking asshole!
  • Nick: (looking over at Anna and Jeremy) someone forgot to take their fucking Midol or something
  • Vanessa: I hate you!

And she slapped me a third time.

  • Nick: I dare you bitch… slap me one more fucking time… I fucking dare you, you fat ugly whore.

Vanessa looked at me with crazy on her face, and slapped me again. Without a pause I swing and slap her back as hard as I could. She yelled out, and started crying. Jeremy got up and took me into the kitchen, and Anna sat down with Vanessa to see if she was alright.

  • Anna: OMG she is bleeding
  • Jeremy and I: What!?
  • Anna: Blood is coming out of her ear.

Yea… So we finally did sober up that night, and I took her home. The next day she called me and told me her ear drum was ripped, and that she couldn’t really hear in that ear anymore. I have to admit I felt kind of bad, but hello you shouldn’t hit someone if you don’t want to get hit back. Turns out a couple months later her ear drum fixed itself, and she could hear again. Soon after we decided to move in together and if you know me, then you know how that turned out.

And that… is one of Nick’s Greatest Moments.

Dear Scott Hamilton,

You are so fucking nauseating. I STG if I had to listen to one more scream out of your goddamn mouth tonight I was going to grab one of the lace strings off of Johnny Weir’s outfit and strangle you with it. It’s like every grunt, ooh, and aah that comes out of your mouth is a yelp of ecstasy from a lipstick lez. I’m so glad we don’t ever have to see your ugly mug during the performances coz no one wants to see that O face while you jiz over Lysacek’s triple-lutz-quadruple-toe-loop-spin-on-my-foot-trip-over-a-dumb-bitch-cuntbag-whore-shut-up-saokao-Michelle-Kwan-eats-dirty-ew of a jump. I’m over it. You are the worst/nastiest commentator ever!!

Seriously nauseating. How ’bout you and Bob Costas retire together at a B&B in Montana and go jerk off to old tapes of Brian Boitano and Kurt Browning.

Surya Bonaly,

Benutty