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Posts tagged cool calm collected
Vamos Gigantes!!
Oct 28th
‘scuse me the Giants are HOT this season (and by hot I mean they’re both hella good players and hella gorgeous-ferosh men) and they’re fitting to win the freaking World Series, girls. We all know that nothing is more important in a championship team than looking sexy. I mean, hello, they didn’t win their division and their league by being good baseball players. As if.
So, so, so sorry to all the hater-whores out there (see: FrankieRose, Aunt Frawn, HRH), but here’s a look at the goodies I already bagged as my boyfriends:
Andres Torres
- Bitches, I’ve had his players card in my wallet all season. Mostly because his ass is the size of Jupiter.
Freddy Sanchez
- Nothing is more mami-sexy than a toddler temper tantrum trot. No, seriously, watch him leave the batter’s box after a strike-out. Toddler temper tantrum trot. Copyrighted it.
Pat Burrell
- Minus the chew this fool is so southern gentleman sophisticated calm looking. Also: The Machine in leather fetish-wear.
Santiago Casilla
- Yummy yummy cool calm collected
Javier Lopez
- OMG. Sweet Mother of All Things Made of Glitter this fool is sex on a stick with a slick sidearm.
And let’s not forget the ones Nick is already sleeping with:
- Fear the Beard? No… fear his big dick going up inside me all night long! Seriously though… how hot is this man, and what is up with his Folsom Street Fair fetishes!
- He hit me just like he did Chase Utley, but unlike Chase I hit him back. Over and over. This boy has hot latino passion and you all know that is my weakness! (PS: I’d do Utley too)
- You know I have a thing for guys whose beard is darker than the hair on their head. Yes! Hottie hot! I think I A – Felt something in my pants!
I know what you are thinking. Um Nick has a thing for pitchers. Well not so… I also love Andres Torres, but hello.. who doesn’t? Even Alfie would hit that.
What about the other D@2 friends and family:
- Oh don’t touch FrankieRose’s man… she is all over this hippie like pot at a Grateful Dead concert.
- Leave it to Aunt Frawn to be with the home run star of the last 2 games. She must be doing something right! Keep it up Aunt Frawn!
- Jay would like the guy who sort of looks like Nick… They share the same ears. I’m disNICKed!
- Gary Jr. loves the young fit guys full of energy… “it’s ok baby, just lay there, and I’ll do all the work.” aww how nice of Buster… or as Gary calls him… Butt Buster!
- Shawnito loves his smile, and his sexy beard. Time to get matching tattoos boys!
- HRH loves her short stop chocolate daddy.
D@2 Blogger Auditions for Survivor on CBS.com!
Feb 9th
Unfortunately for everyone but me, I discovered that CBS is allowing fans to upload video applications for upcoming seasons of Survivor online! I tried out for the show a couple years ago at the Verizon in Emeryville, but didn’t get a call-back. I also tried out for Big Brother back in the day — (if you google my name that video will come up in the search) — and didn’t get a call back on that one either. Hopefully third time’s a charm!
Wait. I also tried out for Real World waaaaaaay back in the day. I’m fucked.
But maybe, just maybe, I’ll get a call-back this time. I like need to meet Ozzy.
Help me get noticed by viewing my audition video and commenting on how cute I look, how funny I am, and how badly you want me on the show!!
After that, make your own and try out, too!