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Posts tagged champes
This Place About To Blow
Feb 25th
Ke$ha – Blow (Video)
This place is bout to blow alright cause Ke$ha is killing it! I just watched Ke$ha’s new video for Blow and it is AH-mazing! It has everything you could have ever wanted in a video… unicorns, rainbows, Ke$ha not looking homeless, fighting, champes, and of course a sexy looking James Van Der Beek. The dialogue between Ke$ha and James had me weak… The whole video is just so over the top ridiculous. It is what I imagine Benutty’s dreams to be like because that fool has some far out dreams.
LOVE IT
Jennifer Lopez – On The Floor (Feat. Pitbull)
J-Lo has returned to making simple dance songs and I love it. I was a big J-Lo fan back in the day but then she decided to get really ghetto, and I am sorry… it just did not work for me. This song does have some rap in it, but it doesn’t ruin the song like the way the rap at the beginning of Umbrella by Rihanna ruined that song. I know a lot of the songs on her new album were produced by Red One so it sounds like it is going to be a good album. Looking forward to it. Let’s just hope her video is good.
LOVE IT
Believe in the Magic…
Dec 16th
I received a Christmas card from our biggest fan whore stalker FrankieRose today. I don’t know how this sneaky little bitch got my address, but if she ever shows up here without a bottle of champes in hand she dies!… oh and a York peppermint patty! That’s right, I said it!
What I find interesting is how alike the troll family is. Just recently Benutty was trying to convince me that he was more like an elephant than a troll…. mmhmm… more like an elephant-troll hybrid… but then the other Benutty, FrankieRose, just happens to send me a holiday card with an elephant on it… curious isn’t it?
Cute card though… loves it!
I’m Offended!
Nov 20th
While I was on Grindr the other night, just fucking with bitches who messaged me, I got a message from a nasty old guy. At first I thought… “oh this guy is bold!… this is gonna be fun”, but soon after he offended me in the worst way. Read below my pretties!
Oh hell no.. Never tell a gay man “all that juicy body!” Dead!
Pig Sex
Mar 15th
If Nick ever tries to do an interpretive dance to “sex” again I’m gonna toss a spear in his belly & skewer that mother-effer over a Hawaiian bonfire (with an apple in his snout for flavor, yes).
So Jay had his second birthday party this past Saturday (can’t wait for third birthday party!) and for some reason we decided to do Interpretive Dance Charades — Nickypoo drew the “sex” card and the papa-papa-razzi caught it on they cams. I paid a shit-ton of $$ for exclusive rights to these photos, so please enjoy.
Dumb bitch has an itch, gonna twitch for that bad ass shit!
Sex is… Pig pulling out his pignis for all to see (or NOT see as the case may be)
Sex is… Pig losing his balance and typping it over like boxed wine
Sex is… crawling when you can't get back up (it's a hard-pig life)
Sex is… following the Snout-Trail to scent of fresh champes
Sex is… finding champes, surrounding champes, snatching champes, opening wide & deep-snouting champes
Sex is… swallowing champes whole, glass & all
Diet Update 03/15/10
Mar 15th
This last week was not my best week, but I am glad I at least lost 2 pounds. Saturday I got a little out of control with champes and cookies, but they were damn good! Oh and those little bitches selling their girl scout cookies all over the place are not helping me one bit.
I’ll be riding my bike to work all week since it is finally nice. I need to work these legs before I get troll thunder thighs. That’s right, I said it.
02/15/10 – 212 pounds
02/22/10 – 212 pounds (Failed)
03/01/10 – 210 pounds (-2)
03/08/10 – 205 pounds (-5)
03/15/10 – 203 pounds (-2)
Oh yea.. You know how when you wash your jeans they always seem to shrink, and you can’t fit in them as easily as you did before? Well this morning…for the first time in a long time…mine were easy to put on. What!! Can I get a amen up in here?
Diet Update 03/01/10
Mar 1st
What a tough week! The Thai food I had last Friday was a killer, not to mention the birthday dinner I had with Jay and his family. Plus Saturday I got a little drunkies with my mami’s. Still… with all that bullshit I managed to lose 2 pounds. Holla! Let’s see how this next week goes. Wish me luck bitches!
02/15/10 – 212 pounds
02/22/10 – 212 pounds (Failed)
03/01/10 – 210 pounds (-2)
The Jersey Shore
Feb 7th
Q: What happens when you get hella drunkies in football jerseys to take a picture?
Photo: HRH Hannah
A: Benutty still wears a brooch & drinks le champerelles.
UPDATE: Aunt F. saved the day — she dug up another bottle of champes for the huhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnies.
Drinks. Champes. Football. Jealous. FrankieRose. Hungry. Mami. Huh? Dead. Rooster. Oops. Nick?
Word to the Wise (Bitch! You Ain’t Wise! Die.)
Feb 7th
Seriously? Don’t show up at a Super Bowl party empty handed. The two bottles of champes in the fridge are almost gone and I’ve only had 7 glasses!
If you wanna die at 2 I dare you to show up at the next party without your own liqs. If you’re gonna want a drink then bring your own shits bitch!
Word to the wise you feeeecking lezzies.