Next stop… Horror!
Sweetums Series
World Premiere Video of Sweetums
Apr 8th
Hey folks and troll babies–
I’m so sorry that I’ve been silent for so long. You see, I went to the Russian River Valley for a weeklong spa vacay with Misha. It was so much fun. We drank too much wine and made way too many babies. Anyhoo, after that we headed right into the studio. I guess I forgot to tell you all that back in October Kylie’s people (Steve Anderson, thanks Stevie) caught wind of my Sweetums series. They were in Oakland for her first concert in the States and checking out the local talent. A boa and a Divine tribute later, Kylie was eating out of my well-manicured hand. Or…I was eating out of hers. She loved Sweetums and immediately offered me a recording contract on the Bubbles Devere label. Yyyyes. Hunnies is now famous.
The world premiere of my music video was awesome. Kylie showed up. Gaga was there. Oprah introduced me to my adoring fans. I wasn’t given enough tickets to invite the hunnies. Oopsies. So I sent my film crew to the Haus of Hunnies to record them on premiere night. Enjoy!
Sweetums Series #831711774
Apr 1st
For the love of GaGa, never send Gary Jr. back into the Interior Illusions Lounge on an empty stomach coz she’ll steal your Absolut cocktails, down ‘em and then grab the mic outta your hand.
Then all hell breaks loose on Pride Rock.
Toodles,
Gary Jr.
Sweetums Series: The Collaboration
Feb 21st
That’s right. All the hunnies got together for this one to save Haiti.
Never let Nick, Benutty and Gary Jr. have the keys to your music studio. And never give them 5 bottles of champes to share between the three. They will get a cravin’ for meatloaf.
Ladies Sing the Meatloaf (for Haiti)
Enjoy!
Next week iTunes will be releasing the coveted outtakes from the studio session with the Hunnies. But you will hear it here first ladies and gentlemen and farm animals.
Ladies Who Lunch on Meatloaf and then Gag and Choke then Die like Momma Cass
Sweetums Series #7
Feb 6th
Never give Gary Jr. multiple melon vodka spritzers and then turn on Liza.
You know that bitch is gonna sing showtunes to Benutty and others. Listen to the end.
Toodles,
Gary Jr.
Sweetums Series #6
Jan 30th
Never give Gary Jr. a mimosa at Nick and Jay’s house. Things turn ugly…for Ke$ha.
Lady Sings Another Tranny’s Hit
Toodles,
Gary Jr.
Sweetums Series #5
Jan 27th
Hi folks–
I’ve been drunk and in the studio all this week. It’s been one of those weeks!
Anyway, for this one, it was a pina colada or two or three….and a roofie.
Sweetums Series #4
Jan 25th
After a stiff gin martini, never let Gary Jr. borrow your DVD set of Maude episodes! Never!
Lady Sings the Maude Theme Song
Toodles,
Gary Jr.
Sweetums Series #3
Jan 8th
You mustn’t ever give Gary Jr. a bottle of Moscato d’Asti and the Ke$ha CD on the same evening. Mayhem will ensue.
Toodles,
Gary Jr.
Sweetums Series #2
Jan 3rd
This is what happens at midnight after an In-n-Out Double Double, a throat lozenge, and 99.7’s Clubber’s Commute. The huhhhhnies should never leave me alone on a Saturday night with Misha. Poor Misha just shook his head in horror. He’s going to break up with me for sure.
Toodles,
Gary Jr.
Gary Jr. Sings a Song for His Sweetums
Jan 1st
This is what happens when you leave Gary Jr. alone with a voice recorder, a bottle of champagne and a Kylie CD.
Toodles,
Gary Jr.