Archive for April, 2010

Diet Update 04/26/10

This week I lost an additional 2 pounds making my total lost to date 20 pounds!  How crazy is that.  It makes me pretty sick to think that my body had an additional 20 pounds on it 2 months ago.   Think about how heavy 20 pounds of fat is?   Nasty!   Oh and I went to the store recently, and I tried on some medium shirts…. they totally fit me.   That’s right… I’m down a shirt size bitches!

02/15/10 – 212 pounds
02/22/10 – 212 pounds (Failed)
03/01/10 – 210 pounds (-2)
03/08/10 – 205 pounds (-5)
03/15/10 – 203 pounds (-2)
03/22/10 – 200 pounds (-3)
03/25/10 – 199 pounds (-1)
04/05/10 – 196 pounds (-3)
04/12/10 – 196 pounds (Failed)
04/19/10 – 194 pounds (-2)
04/26/10 – 192 pounds (-2)

Total Lost to Date: 20 pounds

Coming Soon!

Shouldn’t Have Eaten It Then (and Then Told Me About It)

Gary Jr. is a liar because he lies to Nick about what he eats, and I can prove it.

Apr 23, 2010 10:15 PM

Gary Jr.
Are you drunk? I got my h1n1 today.
Dead.

Benutty
Not drunk. But I had three drinks lol

Gary Jr.
Cunt. Sleepover. Yes.
Chouinard.

Benutty
YOU are drunk

Gary Jr.
Sadly no.

Benutty
You don’t have to lie I won’t tell Nick
If u don’t tell him I just made four mini quesadillas

Gary Jr.
Nope I’m not. Lol. But I did have a caramel flan shared with Misha which put me close to my limit.
You fat slut I love quesadillies

Benutty
Nick is so mean when we take cheat moments

Gary Jr.
We need that though. To keep us on the straight and narrow.

Benutty
I’m compromising by not dipping them in sour cream.

Gary Jr.
hahahahahahahahahahahahagg

Benutty
So what?! Who cares?!

Gary Jr.
So cares. Who what.
Strokes.

Apr 23, 2010 10:16 PM

Benutty
Gary Jr. is drunk and bored coz he’s texting stupid shit

Nick
Lol. Love it.

Benutty
He’s denying it.

Nick
Tell him he shouldn’t be drinking.
Lol.

Case closed.

Oops.

Coming Soon!

You Know What I Hate?

I hate when cars hit bicyclist.  While out on a walk today Jay and I saw a bicyclist get hit by a car.  The car should have yielded to the bike, but you know how it goes.  I called 911 while Jay attended to the cyclist.   A big chuck of the guys helmet broke off right where his head had hit the ground.  He had bruises all over his leg and back, and his clothes was torn in all sorts of different areas.  It was pretty scary stuff.   This guy would have totally died if he had not had a helmet on.  Besides all that he seemed fine, but the paramedics took him away just in case.   For me this is a huge eye opener because anytime I ride short distances I always go without my helmet.  Stupid!   Be safe bitches (and by bitches I mean Shawnito)… where your helmets.

The more you know  *shooting star*

Candy or Chile Relleno?

So Misha and I have been in Oakland for almost a year and we just discovered Jack London Square. Oops. It’s cuties and kinda yuppie but given the rest of Oakland it’s a refreshing change. Anyway, Misha and I decided to splurge and eat out. But don’t worry Nickerella, I was a healthy dieter. I limited myself to 9 chips and ordered fish…no beans, nothing fried, very aware of what I was eating. (Although later, Misha and I split a caramel flan which was amazing and it put me within 20 calories of my daily dieting limit. Yikes!)

Anyhoo, Misha ordered a house special chile relleno that is apparenly quite popular. The waiter warned us that it would be on the sweeter side but still have some savory. It arrived looking like a candy! Candied chile relleno? So strange. It was some sort of almond purée with pomegranate reduction. And oddly enough, he loved it. I tried the sauce and it worked. So strange.

Coming Soon!

Nick’s Greatest Moments: The Road Rash Incident

Unlike a lot of people I know, when I was in High School we were allowed to leave campus for lunch. During my freshman and sophomore years we would walk to nearby fast food restaurants until my junior year when my friend Amber got a car. I remember on one particular day seven of us wanted to go to McDonalds for lunch. This meant that two people would sit in the front of the car and 5 in the back. I was one of the last people to get in the car, and I had to really squeeze into the back to fit. We could barely close the door on my side. Our friend Pearl just sprawled out on top of all our laps. Keep in mind that this was before seatbelt laws folks.

To get into the drive thru at McDonalds from the direction we were coming from you have to turn left and immediately turn left again into the parking lot. So you are basically making a U-Turn. Well Amber always liked to take that turn really fast, and this time was no different. We came up on the intersection speeding, and then she started making the turn… screeching her tires. The force of it pushed everyone right on to my side of the car smashing me up against the door. The next thing I know Pearl reaches over and opens my door, and I go flying out of the car into the street! Thank goodness there were no other cars on the road or I might have been run over. Amber stopped the car in the driveway of McDonalds and all my friends start filing out laughing their asses off. The humor of the situation quickly ended as I stood up. My whole right arm was covered in blood, and I was not happy. I slowly made my way over to where everyone was, and I walked right up to Pearl and back handed her with my good arm as hard as I could while calling her a stupid bitch. Needless to say Pearl and I were not that great of friends after this.

On the plus side I got to go home for the rest of the day.

And that… is one of Nick’s Greatest Moments.

ProjRun Finale Blah. NEXT!

Ugh! Just finished watching the finale of the latest season of Project Runway with G and N and couldn’t possibly feel more underwhelmed. In my opinion all three collections were boring tragedies. But I’m quick to judge so I figured I’d search around online for stills of the looks to make sure I didn’t miss some hidden gems… and to my pleasant surprise I came across a fantastic site showing TEN collections!

That’s correct, bitches. In real-time, Fashion Week happened back when there were still 10 designers left on the show so to keep the finalists a secret they all showed collections at Bryant Park!

After looking through all of the collections I definitely would have put together a different finale. Here are some of my yays & mehs from the boring clothes makers:

My final 3:
Jay and Seth Aaron and Anthony

Worst collections:
Ben and Jesse

Best looks:
- Emilio’s showstopper
- Amy’s Siobhan Magnus

Worst looks:
- Mila’s fug
-Janeane’s stalagmite shoulders

Can’t decide how I feel:
Jonathan’s True Blood-chic or GaGa-gone wrong?

Check out the fantastic site where I found these to look at the full collections for yourself!

This Diet is Bullshit

Well, it’s only bullshit when you want to try to make a lower calorie cake. Low calorie cakes are disgusting in case any of the three readers of this blog wanted to know. I have never made such a cake before and I figured oh why not! I bought granulated Splenda to replace the sugar. Replaced the oil for applesauce. And only used the egg whites. The whole recipe is tres simple:

  • 1/2 cup of splenda sugar blend
  • 3/4 cup of unsweetened apple sauce
  • 3 egg whites
  • 1 tablespoon vanilla extract
  • 1 tablespoon baking powder
  • 1 1/2 all purpose flour
  • 3/4 cup of blueberries

Mix wet then add dry. Add blueberries at end and bake at 350 for about 20 minutes.

The result 8 pieces of cake each at only 98 calories a slice. Cake consistency? No, more like sodabread. Flavor? None…bread with splenda, essentially. Here is my final product:

But don’t get me wrong. I’ve eaten a slice every morning since the day I baked it. What! Haha. And I’ve lost 8 pounds. Suck on that! Oh and here’s the picture of the “same” cake from the recipe page on the internet. I’m calling bullshit on this one:

Question of the Week (04/17 – 04/23)

This week’s question was asked by Hugh Gadick of Den Haag, Netherlands:

Write a 50 word personals ad for each member of the Haus of Honies to appear in your local newspaper.

Nick:

Desperately seeking Susan. And by Susan, I mean David Beckham. But if he’s unavailable, I might consider sleeping with one of you bitches. If you’re lucky! That’s right I said it. I want body hair, facial hair and a well-trimmed beard or stubble. Looking for a spit for this little piggy.

Benutty:

Horny troll bottom looking for dom black top for corporate understall action. You come in. Find the stall next to the giggling mess. Tap your leather boot. I’ll put down my iPhone, stop blogging and will return your favors.

Jay:

Looking for a whistle. You see, I’m a whistleblower. Nothing gets me hotter than blowing on my union whistle and using a bullhorn. I’d love to grab you by the bull’s horns and take you for a ride. Pig bottoms only, please. You see, I miss my boyfriend.

Alfie:

SWM seeks SWMtF for transexual naked yoga encounter. Cannot host. Creepy roommate is always trying to get in on the action. Must be discreet. Did I mention I have a girlfriend who is also up for the challenge?

__________________

Stay tuned for the other responses this week.

Submit your own Question.

Not-So-Deep Conversations

So I bought a bottle of water today and headed into work.  The elevator was full of people, and this random guy turned to me and said… “You bought a bottle of water on Earth Day?”.  I looked down at my bottle, and said… “Um… I’m going to recycle it.”